[ it's a rare day off and yamato no kami yasusada is still wiping the dojo floor with people's asses. actual news at eleven.
there's something very compelling about the transformation yasusada undergoes whenever he steps onto the training room floor. his easy-going nature gets swept under a rug, for one, along with the gentle wondrous tone that he adopts when chatting merrily about anything ranging from horses to being patted. similarly, his wide-eyed look of abject innocence goes the way of the dodo. it's hard to remember that this is the same sword who'd just been admiring how sparkly horse eyes are a scant three ago when everything about him on the dojo floor now all but screams i'll put you into the ground, you pathetic cretin.
it's an understatement to say that yasusada takes sparring a little too seriously.
he's been at it since seven this morning, too, consistently and methodically beating up every person who steps in with a single-mindedness he usually reserves for slaughtering their enemies and being gloomy about okita-kun. the non-stop sparring has left him sweaty, the back of his neck sticky and his breath heavy, though he remarkably keeps his breathing even as he lowers his training sword with military precision. ]
You're dead. [ that's putting it mildly. ] Next.
[ are you his unfortunate training partner? are you next in line to get your ass kicked around the dojo? did you peer in to see what workaholics were still training on a rare day off like this? yasusada's been at this for the past three hours, and he's likely to do this for three more like the over-eager yamato nadeshanko he is if nobody drags him out the twilight zone that is the citadel dojo. please do something before he decides that not enough people are excited about being beaten up and goes out to drag more people in himself... i mean, you could be next. you never know. ]
ii. karaoke with vegetables
[ further proof that when yasusada isn't training, actively shanking something or being gloomy about dead people, he honestly has no idea what's going on. yasusada, in essence, can be compared to that of a piggy bank, if his head is the bank and the coins are obsessive thoughts about battle and shanking things. once you empty out the bank, all you have left is a whole lot of air and maybe a few unpaid bills. in essence, yasusada is an airhead by nature, and once you take the fight out of him (or if that can't be done, remove him from the fight) he becomes almost charmingly funny.
case in point, he's discovered the karaoke channel on television. armed with a set of microphones that nobody knew they had but that he somehow had procured from out of thin air, he's now very engaged in singing whatever that happens to come on-screen.
join him in his adventures to be the best karaoke master there ever was? challenge him to a sing-off so you can finally change your channel to national geographic? stop this nonsense before he actually scares all the younger tantous to tears? it's up to you, friend. ]
iii. for all you insect haters out there, this unnecessary violence is dedicated to you
[ it doesn't matter where you are, or what you're doing, but suddenly, everything is bugs.
okay, that's an exaggeration. there's only one bug here. but the problem is, it's big, it's nasty, it probably has like 23894728934 legs and is 0.3 seconds away from crawling up your pant leg or something. maybe you were just trying to write up a note, or you're trying to take a cat-nap (in the middle of the day, you lazy ass) but suddenly there's this big-ass bug wigging out your day, and you can't help the screech that comes out of your mouth, proving that the average age of the swords in the citadel is four years old and nobody can convince me otherwise.
luckily, there's one sword in this encampment who hates insects more than you do. not three seconds after the initial scream, a sudden sword spears down from the heavens to the cacophony of hallelujah to end what would have been a very embarrassing scramble around a bug 1/70th of your size. yes, you could even be in the baths, and yasusada will somehow find his way there to shank that thing. he has a bullshit radar. apparently it picks up on squirmy insects too. and it'd almost be funny if it weren't for the fact that his expression looks like it could've been animated by shaft...
thankfully, the moment passes quickly enough, and his air-headed cheer is back as he casually flicks the dead bug to the side. was that all just a dream? you just don't know, but at least the bug is dead. ]
yamato no kami yasusada / punch me
[ it's a rare day off and yamato no kami yasusada is still wiping the dojo floor with people's asses. actual news at eleven.
there's something very compelling about the transformation yasusada undergoes whenever he steps onto the training room floor. his easy-going nature gets swept under a rug, for one, along with the gentle wondrous tone that he adopts when chatting merrily about anything ranging from horses to being patted. similarly, his wide-eyed look of abject innocence goes the way of the dodo. it's hard to remember that this is the same sword who'd just been admiring how sparkly horse eyes are a scant three ago when everything about him on the dojo floor now all but screams i'll put you into the ground, you pathetic cretin.
it's an understatement to say that yasusada takes sparring a little too seriously.
he's been at it since seven this morning, too, consistently and methodically beating up every person who steps in with a single-mindedness he usually reserves for slaughtering their enemies and being gloomy about okita-kun. the non-stop sparring has left him sweaty, the back of his neck sticky and his breath heavy, though he remarkably keeps his breathing even as he lowers his training sword with military precision. ]
You're dead. [ that's putting it mildly. ] Next.
[ are you his unfortunate training partner? are you next in line to get your ass kicked around the dojo? did you peer in to see what workaholics were still training on a rare day off like this? yasusada's been at this for the past three hours, and he's likely to do this for three more like the over-eager yamato nadeshanko he is if nobody drags him out the twilight zone that is the citadel dojo. please do something before he decides that not enough people are excited about being beaten up and goes out to drag more people in himself... i mean, you could be next. you never know. ]
ii. karaoke with vegetables
[ further proof that when yasusada isn't training, actively shanking something or being gloomy about dead people, he honestly has no idea what's going on. yasusada, in essence, can be compared to that of a piggy bank, if his head is the bank and the coins are obsessive thoughts about battle and shanking things. once you empty out the bank, all you have left is a whole lot of air and maybe a few unpaid bills. in essence, yasusada is an airhead by nature, and once you take the fight out of him (or if that can't be done, remove him from the fight) he becomes almost charmingly funny.
case in point, he's discovered the karaoke channel on television. armed with a set of microphones that nobody knew they had but that he somehow had procured from out of thin air, he's now very engaged in singing whatever that happens to come on-screen.
the upside: he's surprisingly good.
the downside: all the songs are awkwardly morbid.
join him in his adventures to be the best karaoke master there ever was? challenge him to a sing-off so you can finally change your channel to national geographic? stop this nonsense before he actually scares all the younger tantous to tears? it's up to you, friend. ]
iii. for all you insect haters out there, this unnecessary violence is dedicated to you
[ it doesn't matter where you are, or what you're doing, but suddenly, everything is bugs.
okay, that's an exaggeration. there's only one bug here. but the problem is, it's big, it's nasty, it probably has like 23894728934 legs and is 0.3 seconds away from crawling up your pant leg or something. maybe you were just trying to write up a note, or you're trying to take a cat-nap (in the middle of the day, you lazy ass) but suddenly there's this big-ass bug wigging out your day, and you can't help the screech that comes out of your mouth, proving that the average age of the swords in the citadel is four years old and nobody can convince me otherwise.
luckily, there's one sword in this encampment who hates insects more than you do. not three seconds after the initial scream, a sudden sword spears down from the heavens to the cacophony of hallelujah to end what would have been a very embarrassing scramble around a bug 1/70th of your size. yes, you could even be in the baths, and yasusada will somehow find his way there to shank that thing. he has a bullshit radar. apparently it picks up on squirmy insects too. and it'd almost be funny if it weren't for the fact that his expression looks like it could've been animated by shaft...
thankfully, the moment passes quickly enough, and his air-headed cheer is back as he casually flicks the dead bug to the side. was that all just a dream? you just don't know, but at least the bug is dead. ]
x. choose your own yams adventure??
[ punch me. i'll punch back. ]